Tinder definitely seems like an incredibly simple system for meeting people and dating. You literally do it on your phone and can decide who you want to date and who you don’t with the swipe of a finger. However, we all know that no matter how much you want to streamline it dating is still kind of a complicated and difficult thing to do, and even on Tinder it can be difficult to navigate the right things and wrong things to do.
So if you’re a Tinder dater (or at least a Tinder swiper) who isn’t quite sure how to handle things after you’ve actually made a match then we have 10 great tips and tricks on how you can totally nail your Tinder interactions without falling into any uncomfortable, or even potentially dangerous, pitfalls.
10-Do Discuss: Personal Preferences
When you initially match with someone on Tinder it is presumably on the basis of some very superficial and minimal information that you have about one another. That’s definitely a decent point to start from, but what you really want to do is get more in-depth about your personal likes and dislikes to get a better idea of how compatible you really are. The minutia of your own preferences probably won’t be a deal breaker for any relationship, but if your major personality traits actually wind up matching up then you have a great starting line for the future.
9-Don’t Discuss: Personal Info
When you’re starting up a conversation with a potential love interest then you definitely want them to get a good idea of who you are as a person, but don’t ever lose sight of the fact that this person is a complete stranger. You might be interested in them, but you definitely don’t want to be sharing any kind of identifying personal info until you actually know whether or not you’re chatting up a normal person or an unhinged creep. Personal information in the wrong hands can be devastating, so always keep that in mind when you’re talking to your Tinder match.
8-Do Discuss: Plans For A First Date
Starting up a conversation from almost nothing can be difficult and awkward for anyone, even if you consider yourself a good conversationalist.
So if you’ve had a good chat with a new Tinder match but you’re feeling a little lost on where to go from there, or if you think you like this person enough to actually meet face to face, then you might as well start discussing ideas for your first date. It’s a great conversation starter and doesn’t leave the progression of your Tinder match in limbo, and ultimately you won’t know how you really feel about a person until you meet them in person.
7-Don’t Discuss: Plans For A Relationship
It’s obvious that a lot of people on Tinder are looking to start up a relationship, but even if that’s the goal in mind for you and your Tinder match, make sure that you’re not moving things too fast before you’ve even met yet. You might really like each other in text conversation but your in-person interactions might be a dud, and frankly getting into relationship talk before you’ve met can easily veer into creepy territory, even if you’re both talking about it as a joke. If you want to avoid making things feel super awkward super fast, then leave the relationship talk alone.
6-Do Discuss: Absolute Dealbreakers
The way you feel about someone personally can really affect how you see a lot of other things. Sometimes certain behaviors or personality traits that you thought you really didn’t like wind up not being an issue when you’re with someone that you really like. However, it’s pretty safe to assume that you’ll have certain traits or behaviors that are an absolute dealbreaker for you no matter what. If you do have specific stop signs for any relationship, then you should talk those over with your Tinder match, there’s no point in getting beyond a courtesy conversation if you know you don’t want to be with that person.
5-Don’t Discuss: Maybe Dealbreakers
There are certainly a lot of things about other people that you might find annoying, unappealing, or downright gross, but don’t bring those things up with your Tinder match unless they’re a 100% dealbreaker. If you haven’t met someone in real life then it’s hard to judge how their particular quirks will make you feel, and if you tell your match about things that you just dislike then it can start the real-life meeting off with a kind of sour taste, or in the worst case scenario your complaints about certain behaviors or traits could leave your match feeling a little personally offended.
4-Do Discuss: Things That You’re Interested In
Discussing your interests with a new person is kind of killing two birds with one stone. Firstly, you’re letting your match know what kind of stuff that you’re into, which gives them a good view into your personality and can give them great opportunities to find some common ground with each other.
Secondly, when people are talking about things that they’re personally passionate about that usually brings out the best in them, and you and your match obviously always want to be putting your best feet forward when you’re first introducing each other and getting to know one another.
3-Don’t Discuss: Everything
When you first match with someone you have a significant interest in it can be very exciting, and you can feel like you want to be talking to your Tinder crush 24 hours a day and discussing everything under the sun. That level of excitement is definitely a good sign, but you also want to keep in mind that eventually you’re probably going to date or at least meet in person, and you want to have something left to discuss when you actually do meet face to face. Don’t put everything out on the digital table if you ever plan on meeting across a real table.
2-Do Discuss: What Interests You About Each Other
Discussing your own interests with your Tinder crush is fantastic, but another great conversation to have with your Tinder match is what interests you about each other. Even if you don’t have a personal interest in something yet, it’s good to let your Tinder match know if something that they’re interested in or that they do interests you too. It gives you both something to build on, and it’s bound to make your Tinder match feel like they’re actually an interesting person, which is also bound to make them feel good about themselves. Starting things off on a complimentary note is always a good plan.
1-Don’t Discuss: Anything That Isn’t PG
Let’s face facts, there are a pretty large amount of creepy people on Tinder who wrongfully assume that everyone else is on Tinder for the same reasons. Even if you’re only looking for a hook up, you don’t want to be talking to someone who doesn’t even seem to have respect for you as a person, and the same goes for you when you’re talking to someone else. You know what your own boundaries are, but you don’t know the boundaries of a stranger, so you’re better off keeping the conversation PG and not making them feel uncomfortable at any point before you’ve even met.