The idea of a perfect spouse is different for everyone. Some people dream about being with someone fun and adventurous, while others are looking for a strong provider and rock, and others are looking for someone caring and compassionate. Even though perfect means something different to all of us, there are still a few universal ideal qualities that make someone marriage material.
If we’re going to commit ourselves to someone for the rest of our lives, they should make us happy. They should give us energy rather than drain us, support us when we need it and follow through with their promises to us. They should make us feel safe and sure of ourselves and our relationship, while still keeping things exciting. The person we marry should be the one that enhances our life with their presence.
Of course, it’s pretty rare to find someone who ticks every single one of our boxes. Love can overcome some pretty strong odds, so we shouldn’t worry if the person we can see a future with doesn’t display all of these qualities. But if they do, hold onto them tight!
Keep reading to find out what she does that makes her wife material.
25She Accepts The Things He’s Insecure About (Like His Grey Hairs)
It’s important to be with someone who accepts you for who you are, and doesn’t hold your flaws against you. We all have things that we’re insecure about, and it’s going to be a long, miserable life if you have to be with someone who makes you feel worse about those things rather than making you feel better about them. If someone can’t accept the things you feel insecure about, they’re probably not the person you should marry.
24She Motivates Him To Exercise With Her
You’re very lucky if you end up with someone who motivates you to be your best self. It may seem annoying if she sometimes gets on your back about keeping your fitness up or eating the right foods, but that’s actually a quality that a good spouse will have. She does that because she cares about your overall wellbeing and health, and wants you to be the best person you can. That is someone you want in your corner!
23She Asks About His Day (And Is Actually Interested)
It’s a good sign if you have the feeling that you want to tell her everything that happens in your life. If she’s the one you first think of when something good or bad happens, and you can’t wait to share your news with her, no matter what it is, she could be the one for you. That bond between you is one of the things it takes to make a marriage last for a lifetime, so it’s promising if you have that already.
22But She Doesn’t Force Him To Do Things He Doesn’t Want To Do
While it’s a blessing to have a spouse who cares about your health and motivates you to stay on top of it, you don’t necessarily want someone who nags you and puts pressure on you when you just don’t want to do something. You need a life partner, not a parent. Hold on tight if she is able to motivate you to make positive changes in your life, but she does it without forcing you or shaming you into making them.
21She Spoils Him By Cooking For Him
Wife material no longer means someone who will slave in a kitchen all day for you and sew up the rips in your pants. Especially if she’s working full-time too! That said, it is nice to be with someone who isn’t afraid to spoil you, and cooking is one of the best ways to do that. If she doesn’t cook, there might be another way in which she makes you feel special and shows you that she appreciates you.
20She Doesn’t Rely On Him For Everything Little Thing
The person you end up with should make your life better, not worse. If she relies on you for absolutely everything, you’re probably going to feel stressed out a lot of the time. Instead, stick with a girl who has a sense of independence, can look after herself and doesn’t expect you to cater to her every need. She should understand that you have your own life to lead, and don’t exist to fight all her battles for her.
19She Gets Along With His Friends
There will always be more harmony in your life if your friends get along with the person you end up marrying. Of course, you don’t have to be with someone they like, but it’s easier if you are—social events will be a breeze rather than something to stress about. Plus, if they’re good friends, they’ll be able to weigh in on who’s good for you and who’s not. If they love her, it could be a sign that she’ll make you happy.
18And His Family Too
It’s an even better sign if your parents approve of her! The kind of relationship you have with your parents obviously makes a difference, but if they have your best interests at heart and they approve of her, it suggests that she’s good for you in one way or another. Not always, but parents usually have a good hunch about these things anyway. They might not know everything, but there’s a good chance their opinion of the person you love will mean a lot.
17She Doesn’t Demand Sacrifices From Him
Successful relationships require compromise from both ends, but they don’t demand endless sacrifice—especially when that’s coming from one person only. You might have to reevaluate the relationship if you’re with someone who demands that you give up a lot of other things in your life to make them happy. It’s just not worth it! Instead, seek out someone who doesn’t put you in that uncomfortable position where you always have to sacrifice things in order to make them happy.
16She Feels Confident In Sweats
The first stages of a relationship are usually based on chemistry and attraction. People usually put a lot of effort in during the early days. But all that glamour tends to wither away after a while. You should hold onto the person that you’re still attracted to even when the honeymoon phase is over and she no longer glams it up with expensive dresses and red lipstick. If you love her and want her even when she’s in pajamas, it’s a good sign.
15She Holds Her Own Around Him
It’s a promising sign that someone is marriage material if they have confidence within themselves. Being with a person who loses their self-identity when they get into a relationship and clings onto you because they don’t know who they really are could become taxing after a couple of years. You might be able to help someone through those kinds of insecurity issues, so all hope isn’t lost if she can’t hold her own around you. It could be something to work on!
14She Takes Care Of Him When He’s Sick
All other qualities aside, you should be with someone who won’t take advantage of you when you’re vulnerable, and will care for you when you need help. Being sick is always hard, and it’s inevitable. So you should make sure you’re with someone who can make your life easier when you go through a period of being sick. She doesn’t have to make you chicken soup from scratch—she just has to care about you and try to help you feel better.
13She Keeps His Deepest Thoughts Private
One of the most important elements to marriage is trust, and it also happens to be a rare attribute among people. We’d say that this one is pretty non-negotiable. If you can’t trust her, then it might be worth rethinking whether you really want her in your future or not. Trusting her means knowing in your heart that she’ll stay faithful, that she’ll keep her promises, and that she has your best interests in mind. You don’t deserve anything less from a wife!
12She Gives Him Space When He Needs It
Being married to someone is a long-term commitment, but every marriage is different and has its own set of rules. Some people need more space and alone time than others, and you should stay with someone who gives you the space you need without making you feel bad about it. Life with them is going to be easier than life with someone who never gives you alone time to just chill out and breathe. You’ll end up happier and less stressed.
11They Share Many Beliefs
They say that a couple has the highest chance of lasting together if they share the same values and core beliefs. You don’t have to agree on every little thing, and it might actually help your relationship if there are differences between you that may help you both to grow. But you’ll be the best team if you agree about the things that matter, like how to raise kids, what the important things in life are and what constitutes a good person.
10She’ll Always Be There To Support Him
A spouse should act like your personal cheerleader. They might not chant at you when you’re feeling down, but they should always be there to support you. That’s one of the best things about being married, and the reason why many people choose to be in relationships in the first place. If you’re with someone who always supports you, appreciate them and don’t let them go. If you’re with someone who doesn’t support you, you may as well be single.
9And She Cares About His Goals As If They’re Her Own
There are different levels of support. On one hand, you have the people who show up to be there for you because it’s expected of them, and they know it’s the right thing to do. On the other, you have people who treat your goals as if they’re their own, and are emotionally invested in your success. Your wife should fall into the second category. She should be your biggest fan, and support you with all her heart.
8He Can Talk To Her About Anything
The experts say that communication is key in a relationship, and they’re right. Married life is going to be a lot happier if you can talk to your spouse about absolutely anything. That includes topics that are prickly and hard to bring up. Life will get hard at times, so you have to be able to talk out the issues that arise as you go, and make sure you face them as a team rather than as individuals.
7She Shows Interest In His Interests
You can’t force someone to be into the things you’re into, and if they’re not, you don’t have to dump them. But a girl gets bonus points if she is interested in the same things as you. And if she’s not, she also gets point for showing interest, asking about them and not making you feel stupid for liking them. After all, marriage is always easier when you’re with your best friend, and best friends show interest in each other’s lives.
6He Can Always Count On Her To Be Honest
Being married to someone you can’t count on to be honest would come with a lot of stress. At the very least, you should be able to count on your spouse’s word. The truth is everybody lies to some extent, but it’s not a good idea to commit to someone who lies about the big things frequently. Some people believe that there should be absolutely no secrets between two people in love, and the more honest she is with you, the better.
5She Laughs At His Jokes And Makes Him Laugh
A happy house is filled with laughter. Speaking of marrying your best friend, you should hold onto someone who can always make you laugh and cheer you up when you’re down. Life will be better, trust us. Not only should she be able to crack you up every now and then (even if it’s without trying), but she should also laugh at your jokes. Nobody has time to be married to someone who isn’t even courteous enough to laugh at their jokes!
4She Does’t Judge Him For Crying In Front Of Her
There seems to be a taboo in our society regarding men and showing weakness. Guys often feel like they can’t cry because it’s seen as being weak and feminine. But everybody cries, (unless they’re secretly not human). So you should think twice about marrying someone who won’t let you vent your frustrations and have a cry. Instead, stick with the one who doesn’t judge you when you’re feeling down, and actually gives you a shoulder to cry on.
3She’s Grateful And Appreciates Him
You deserve to be with someone who knows how lucky they are to have you, and who makes you feel appreciated and valued. Obviously, you don’t want to wait around for someone who kisses the ground you walk on and idolizes you like a god, but you don’t have to put up with someone who makes you feel like you’re not good enough. Marry the girl who appreciates you, not the one who makes you feel like she’s better than you.
2They Have Similar Visions For The Future
Your life will run a lot more smoothly if you marry someone whose vision for the future is similar to yours. No matter how much two people love each other, problems will arise if one wants to have children in the suburbs and one wants to travel the world as a couple with nothing holding them back. It counts for a lot if the person you’re in love with wants the same things out of life that you do.
1She Makes Him Happy Without Even Trying
Even if she ticks no other boxes from this list, don’t take for granted the girl who can make you happy. A girl who is trustworthy, honest, funny, caring and supportive isn’t meant to be your wife if after all that she still doesn’t make you happy. You won’t feel happy all the time, but you should spend more time feeling happy than sad when you’re with her. Life is too short to be with someone who doesn’t put a smile on your face.