15 Things A Guy Will Do If He’s Not Into Her (& 15 She’ll Do When She’s Not Interested) - Thoughts Feeds
  • August 25, 2019

15 Things A Guy Will Do If He’s Not Into Her (& 15 She’ll Do When She’s Not Interested)

You know that movie, He’s Just Not That Into You? Well, there is a lot of truth to the things that were said in the movie. Even if a guy or a girl is spending time with you, they could be just biding their time until something better comes along.

But there are some things that guys do that give us signs that he’s not really that into you. We love signs, don’t we? It’s a great way of knowing where you stand in a relationship. For example, if he’s not calling you, then duh, he’s just not that into you.

The same goes for women as we give off signs as well. Our signs are a little more different than the signs that guys give off, though. That can be a good thing or a bad thing. Women can often take more time figuring things out because we are trying to determine whether a guy is right for us or not. There are times when a woman just wants to have fun and she may not have got around to telling her guy yet.

Check out these 15 things a guy will do if he’s not into her (& 15 things she’ll do when she’s not interested).

30He Doesn’t Care That You Go Out All The Time

If you are out clubbing all the time and the guy you are seeing doesn’t seem to mind, then he may not be that into you.

When a guy is truly into a girl, he’s going to start to be bothered by how often she is out partying with her friends.

It comes down to being worried that you are out having more fun without him or that you are getting hit on by other guys. That’s what it’s like having a boyfriend, so if it doesn’t feel like that, you might be getting a sign.

29She Brushes You Off When You Try To Make Plans

When a girl keeps brushing you off and stating that she is so busy all the time, chances are that she’s not really interested in you. Maybe she has a hard time breaking it to you, but her actions speak louder than words. One Thought Catalog user tells guys she’s not interested this way; “I have so many things going on this weekend, maybe another time. If a girl likes you, she’ll make time for you during the weekend or ask you to join her wherever she’s going.”

28He Talks About His Ex All The Time

A guy who is interested in you is not going to be bringing up his ex at every interval. Exes are going to come up at some point while you’re dating, but it’s not something that you should be talking about all the time.

If he’s bringing her up all the time, it might be because he’s not over her yet.

A guy should know how disrespectful it is to talk about an ex to his new girl, so if he does it all the time that might be a red flag.

27She Responds With One-Word Answers

So you have been hanging around with a girl and you think things are going alright but you just aren’t sure. Well, one pretty big indicator is how she responds to your text messages. When you ask you how her day was does she go into long explanations, or does she just respond with one word, like ‘good’? If she only gives you one-word answers, then chances are she doesn’t really care to talk to you that much. She might just be stringing you along.

26Your Gut Is TELLING You He’s Not Into You

Usually, we know deep down when a guy is not into us, we are just afraid to admit it. You probably know yourself when a guy is into you because he acts like he’s into you.

Too many times we talk ourselves into spending time with someone who we know is less invested than we are.

He may not have come right out and said it to you, but if you are noticing that his behavior has changed since you started dating, it might be because he realized that you aren’t the one.

25She Says She Forgot To Text You Back

Boom! We can all probably agree that it’s rare that we ever forget to text someone back. And we certainly wouldn’t forget to text back the hot guy that we were interested in. If a girl says, “I’m so forgetful, I always forget to text people back,” then you can bet that she just doesn’t really care if she talks to you or not. It sucks to be sure, but it’s best to get out of these situations sooner rather than later.

24He Tells You That He’s Not Ready For A Relationship

We hate hearing that, don’t we? It’s like the worst news ever. If a guy tells you that, he’s likely just stringing you along. There are a lot of women out there that hear this statement and yet they will continue baking cookies for these men.

It’s a dismissive statement that tells you pretty clearly that this man has no interest in committing to you.

Unfortunately, it’s unlikely that he will ever change his mind. It’s best to just walk away if you hear that.

23She Won’t Give You A Straight Answer About Seeing You Again

If you keep asking her out and she is indecisive about her plans, it’s probably because she really doesn’t want to see you again. Imagine texting a girl about when you can see her again and you get a response that says, “soon.” That’s not good news for anyone. There are a lot of code words that she will use as a response which basically means, ‘never.’ If you get a response that says, “IDK, you tell me, soon, or we’ll see,’ you might as well assume things are over.

22He Spends More Time At The Gym Than With You

Sure, guys like guy time, but probably not more than his girlfriend. Even guys who spend a lot of time at the gym usually take their favorite girl along with them.

Couples that train together, stay together and all that.

If your man practically lives at the gym, that might be a bad sign. That usually means that he prefers to work out than to spend time with you. It’s all going to depend on who he was when you met him, but if you see his gym time increasing and the cuddle sessions decreasing, there may be a reason for it.

21She Just Wants To Be Single For A While

If a girl tells you that she’s not ready for a relationship, that’s a red flag. Girls generally love relationships. If she says, “I think I just need to be single for a while, I’ve always moved from one relationship to another,” it’s a bad sign. She’s basically telling you that she loves relationships because she has been in so many, but she just has no interest in being in one with you. Ouch! It’s just her subtle way of letting you down easy.

20He Never Makes Plans With You

If you are finding that you are the only one contacting him and making plans, then he’s just not that into you.

When a man adores you, he will literally move mountains to make time for you and see you.

Think about when you first started dating. Did he make plans, was it half and half? If it’s always been you, then that’s a pretty big sign that you may be wasting your time with him. Put it to the test. Resist the urge to make plans with him and see if he contacts you to get together.

19She Tells You She’s Talking To Someone Else

That is another way for a girl to let you off easy though it might not feel that way. She’s probably not even talking to someone else, she just knows that she’s done talking to you. If she says, “I’m talking to someone else right now,” then that’s just her way of saying that she’s officially done with you. There won’t be any use trying to talk her out of it either, not that you’d want to. After all, if you want an exclusive relationship, that won’t happen with this lady.

18He Doesn’t Care How You Dress

A guy that is into you is probably going to ask to see you in a dress or something more glamorous at some point. It’s no surprise that guys like to see their girls in curve-hugging outfits.

So if he never makes a suggestion on your attire, it might be because he really doesn’t care.

It’s unlikely that you are at the stage where he just loves you too much to care about that ratty jean jacket that you wear. So if he never asks you to put on something more appealing, it might be a sign that he doesn’t care.

17She Is Flaky When It Comes To Plans

She may agree to go out with you but then all of a sudden, she texts you and tells you she has to cancel because “something” comes up. Sometimes things can come up out of nowhere, that’s understandable. But if it’s a common occurrence, then you can bet that what is up is that she doesn’t want to see you. Someone who is wishy-washy about seeing you doesn’t really want to spend time with you and that’s the hard truth.

16He’s Very Secretive With You

Men hate it when their girlfriends are secretive and if they suspect it, they will call you on it immediately.

So, if a man is secretive with you, then you can bet there is a reason for it.

Guys who are interested in a girl are generally very open because they want to get to know you. A guy who is already secretive at the beginning of a relationship is bad news and it’s best to avoid him completely. After all, what’s he got to hide?

15She Stands You Up For A Date

There is no doubt about it when someone stands you up, it’s usually a sign that she doesn’t want to spend any time with you. If you were excited to see her on a date and she agreed to go, that’s great news. That is until you show up and she doesn’t. She didn’t bother to call or show up. Not only is it rude but it can be humiliating sitting there and waiting for someone that never shows. The fact that she doesn’t care that you sat and waited for her says everything you need to know.

14He Asks You To Be His Girlfriend Immediately

You may be thinking to yourself, that it’s great news, but a guy that wants to commit immediately is just as bad as someone who doesn’t want to commit at all.

You don’t even know this guy and he’s already asking you to commit? 

Relationship expert and author Lynn Harris says, “I actually know a guy who asked a girl to be his girlfriend during the first date, then broke up with her two weeks later, because he realized that she was ‘boring.’ Well, duh. I’m surprised he even knew anything beyond her first name at that point.”

13She Tells You She Needs To Find Herself

No girl is going to throw away a chance to be with an amazing guy because she “needs to find herself.” You can find yourself and be in an awesome relationship all at the same time. So if she says, “I’m just really lost right now and I need to find myself,” then what she’s really saying is she’s not that into you. Trust us, if the right guy came along she would throw “finding herself” right out the window. You just don’t do it for her.

12He Spends A Ton Of Time With His Friends

We have to assume that a guy that spends all his time with his friends is emotionally immature.

Not that there is anything wrong with spending time with friends, but at some point, a relationship takes precedence.

You should find someone for your life long-term because your friends certainly are going to get married and maybe even have children. A guy who spends a ton of time with his friends is just generally not interested in anything serious, so it should be a hard pass for you.

11She Tells You Not To Post Pictures

We shouldn’t have to even mention this one. If someone you are dating doesn’t want you to post pictures of the two of you together, it’s because she doesn’t want anyone to know that you are dating. We are waving this red flag all over the place. “Don’t post that picture of us on Instagram.” The translation of that message is, “I don’t want that cute guy down the street to know we are dating. Of course, posting pics to social media is usually a big milestone in a relationship, not a casual dating activity.

10He Still Hasn’t Asked You Out

You would be surprised how many women will texts a guy forever and still have not had a date with him. Trust us ladies when we say, if a guy is into you, he will make it happen.

If he has been chatting you up but hasn’t made attempts at physical contact yet, then he’s just not that into you.

You can only flirt for so long before you have to accept the fact that it’s just not going anywhere. It’s not worth it to you to invest any more time into this guy.

9She LOLs All Your Messages

Do you find that your lady sends you “LOL” instead of actually responding to something that you have said to her? It’s because she’s bored to tears and has nothing left to say but “LOL.” Even if you sent her a joke, she doesn’t find it funny, she’s just humoring you. There is really not much good that can come from a “LOL” message, unless it’s followed by some actual conversation. So if that’s all you’re getting from her, then it’s time to move on.

8He Doesn’t Let You Anywhere Near His Phone

Again, this isn’t really something we need to tell you. If a guy is protecting his phone at all costs, it’s usually because he’s sketchy. But unfortunately, there are still a lot of women who will date a guy who won’t let her near his phone.

She continues to respect his privacy even though he acts like he’s hiding something.

At the beginning of a relationship, there is still a chance that he could be seeing other people, or maybe he got bored of you and moved on to someone else.

7She Thinks You Would Be Great With Another Girl

If your new love interest is picturing you dating someone else, then your relationship is dead in the water. “I think you and (insert another girl’s name) would look really cute together.” That pretty much means that she wants to make sure that the two of you have no future together. She doesn’t even plan on leading you on. She’s making it perfectly clear that you should go and meet someone else. She’s not beating around the bush, she’s telling it like it is.

6He’s Not Interested In What You Do

When you first started dating, he seemed to want to know everything about you. Now, not so much. He used to ask about your workouts or the book that you were reading, basically anything you were doing when you weren’t with him.

These days, however, he doesn’t seem to be interested in anything you are doing at all.

If he’s not invested in who you are outside the relationship, then it could mean it’s time for you to find someone new who is.

5She Tells You Obvious Lies

When you ask her what she was up to this weekend she just says that she was chilling. Yet after you check her Instagram posts, you see that she went skydiving. She knows just as well as you do that you can see her page. She lies to you about obvious things because she doesn’t care enough to hide her tracks more carefully. If someone is lying to you for absolutely no reason, it’s a bad sign. She could have told you she went skydiving but instead she didn’t care enough to fill you in.

4He Doesn’t Cuddle With You In Public

The best parts of a new relationship are that it’s usually passionate and exciting. You can barely keep your hand off each other which tends to lead to lots of PDA. It sucks when we see our best friends with guys who are always cuddling them in public, but girls just love that stuff.

If you are with a guy that doesn’t cuddle you or even hold your hand in public, there’s usually a reason for it.

You can definitely ask him what’s up and see what he has to say, but it’s usually a sign that he’s not into you.

3She Will Tell You That The Timing Is Not Right

That’s another lie that women like to tell. It’s just another way for her to let you down easier, in the hopes that she can get out of the situation without hurting your feelings. “The timing is just not right. I just got out of a serious relationship/I need to focus on my career/ I am trying to move to a new city.” Anyone of these statements are just excuses because she doesn’t want to continue to date you. No girl is going to turn away her soul mate because she wants to focus on her career. It is possible to have both.

2He Checks Out Other Women

It’s true that he could just be a jerk. It wouldn’t be the first time a woman dated a guy that had no problem checking out other girls in front of you. But even so, that just tells you that you deserve better.

If a guy is checking out other girls in front of you, then he’s clearly forgotten about what he has in front of him.

Obviously, he is looking for something else. Not only that, but he doesn’t respect you very much.

1She Never Texts You First

That’s a huge red flag and one that you should not ignore. You may think that she’s just playing hard to get or that she wants you to earn her love but that’s rarely the case. It’s much more likely that if she doesn’t text you it’s because she never thinks of you. You know how easy it is to send a text; it literally takes seconds. If you aren’t even worth that much of her time, then why even bother to pursue something with her?

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